Criticism:the best tool for self-sympathy

                   "If the car isn't being driven properly, blame the car and not the driver."
    A very strange but true behavior I recently observed in humans is that criticism has become a tool for self condolence,self-sympathy. When people are unable to reach a stature in life, the best thing they do is criticize the stature(they were aiming for primarily by some or the other reason) and justify their own position(of failing) rather than identifying their shortcomings. By quoting the above phrase, I wish to convey exactly the same thing. What it actually means is that whenever the driver(the person) isn't able to drive correctly, he/she puts the onus on the situations/circumstances(the car) rather than on himself(the driver). It is but obvious that the car is only driven by the driver, maintained by the owner and hence it is the owner or the driver at fault and hardly the car(with a few exceptions).
    People often come with a imaginary high self-esteem for nothing which instills a fear in them to protect their apparent image. This attitude of people prevents them from learning new things and having an open-mind. The whole world is confined to protecting their own image by being obdurate to constructive criticism but freely criticising the people for the shoddy job(which actually may be worthy enough) they just accomplished. I recently experienced this in the campus recruitment drive which was organised by a noteworthy company in our college. With great amount of hardwork put in, I was selected by a giant IT firm entailing considerable respect in the market and having good prospects. I was without any doubt struck by the jubiliance that my hardwork paid off in a handsome way. The jubiliance was not only for getting a job but also for the kind of practical stuff which I was going to work on, having studied loads of theory all my life till date.
   The important aspect worth noting here is the attitude of some people who did not make it, the attitude of their "consoling" friends and some who just wanted to be a part of the "spectate and comment" type of attitude. These people are the ones who wish to spot the negativity in everything others do. People who could not make it were throwing barbs at the company and the people selected by the company. They were of the opinion that the company is "not that great". This indirectly implied that the people selected in the company were a sham or it happened just by luck. People who were not selected were consoled by so many who undermined the company and showed them some optimism by quoting "some better company might pick them up". All these statements come with a secondary meaning that the person selected got a company of "his worth" and that just because someone is not selected he is "more worthy". Very encouraging to the person who couldn't make it but equally discouraging for the person who got selected. Having said this, there are other subtle ways to encourage a person who wasn't selected. Maybe he might get any company which is equally worthy or a company where he deserves to be. There is no company more or less competent in the market; all that matters is one's own interest. Just because he/she doesnt like the job profile or did not make it to the company, its unfair call the company as bad/unworthy.
  I am totally against the practice of blaming other people/entity/organisation for one's own failure. Apart from the genuine people who were really left out, I found that many of them joined the wind of blaming the company and justifying themselves of being a "paragon" of knowledge. for some good people who were left out, opportunities are galore and the world is a huge place to leave out genuine talent unemployed. I staunchly believe that they will get their share but in a company in which they can adapt themselves culture-wise as well.

It's high time we retrospected on the aspects where we lacked rather than vehement criticism of the external conditions which are seldom under our control and which serves no purpose except that of "self symphatising" and apparent justification for one's failure. Finally I would like to end this blog on an inspiring quote:

"A man can fail many times, but he isn't a failure until he blames some one else"
- John Burroughs


Living a life full of compensation!

   Note: Please take note of the sarcasm in this article in some places...Hope you enjoy the read.  
   I am dedicating this article to the habit of "compensating"
Did not get the deserving credit for a job you did??:compensate and let go..afterall you are being "paid" in some or the other way.  Your boss unjustifiably screeching on you for someone else's mistake: compensate and let go because he/she is after all senior to you(keeping aside what is right or wrong). Were not happy with something you just bought??'compensate'.Unjust things happening around you: compensate on your urge to raise your voice and let go to avoid trouble. The habit of compensation has become so banal these days, hasn't it??.
    I just loathe this habit.We have to compensate for so many things in life. Compensate on our values and virtues for the world which demand some unreasonable 'compensation' in these values to survive. I tell you the world is so money centered that irrespective of what you work or contribute, majority of the times money speaks more than anything else. Money is undoubtedly important but I would prioritize following certain ethical values rather than money. .Talking about money, hardwork and diligence are always rewarded handsomely in this world, come what may.Whenever I shared this opinion with others, the response which I got was that I was thinking in a very idealistic way All I would say is that people are just flowing with the crowd and are not having their say enough in this case when they say things are idealistic. Compensating throughout one's life for things may reward one with some "cash" or other fringe benefits but there is nothing which one will take away from this world having suppressed his/her emotions/values just for temporary benefits. I dont find this justified in any case. In this process, a person looses his/her say in matters which require to be opposed. I just sometimes wonder that if everyone worked skillfully and diligently such crooked methods would not have to be followed. When people have something to hide or have done something wrong, such methods come into existence.
   Next comes the habit of compensating on sharing one's emotions. Before opening up to anybody, we have to think twice about the person being trustworthy. The fear of getting one's emotions devalued by sharing it with the wrong people arises. Everybody, almost everybody except a handful of them in this world come without expectations in someone else's life. People are so self-centered that they may seem the best of any dog's species when it comes to portraying loyalty(falsely though) to people whom they have any work with.Once the work's done, slowly you find them distancing themselves from you. In such cases, when the you are in jeopardy/trouble,they might even fail to recognise you forget about anything else. Trusting such people is totally out of question. Frankly speaking such people exist in abundance today; I could just hope they were in rarity.What I wish to convey here is that we cannot be truthful and expressive with the people we wish to. We have to supress our emotions rather than sharing it with unwise people. "TRUST" is a rare and precious commodity whose value has been inflated in a grandiose way owing to the above mentioned factors.To sum up, there can hardly be any person in this world withm you could open up with or trust easily. You always have to compensate on the amount of talks you share with anyone. You can only trust yourself more than anyone else.
   Compensation also comes in the materialistic things we plan to buy. Whenever something doesnt fit into our budget all we do is compensate on the quality or some other factor. When we do compensate here, we console ourselves by the fact that people who are poorer are even devoid of the same object we just bought. What I feel is in order to progress in life, we must always look forward to the people who are at a higher stature than us as a baseline for comparison. In this process, we aim higher for buying the best quality things.I personally feel that our outlook must change in this issue.
    Well folks, its time to compensate on the amount of "compensation" we make in so many aspects. Maybe, someday, we might gain something we never expected.....a clean heart and an unfathomable satisfaction of following our instincts.

Mumbai Meri Jaan

  "The local arriving on platform number one is....." goes an announcement in one of the stations in Mumbai.Following the announcement comes the train, fully loaded with people. There will not be any time of the day when people don't stand on the footboard of the local train. Inspite of so many seats vacant inside, the footboard is always crowded. People wont mind getting down and then boarding the train again at each stop for others to get in and for them to retain their coveted "footboard position" . When I speak of Mumbai, the very first thing by default which comes to my mind are the local trains which are also anointed as "The Lifeline of Mumbai". The tracks which are a few metres wide and enduring tons of weight daily have the capacity to transport myriad number of people which a road of equal width can do but with great difficulty.
  When you go ambling on the streets of Mumbai , the footpaths can be sometimes occupied by small stalls(thellas). Here, you get all sorts of edibles, accessories for a reasonable rate. "dus ka do"(10 for 2), "nahi rukiye madam, aat mei leke jaeye"(wait madam, take this away for 8 bucks) are some of the common statements heard while the transactions are finalized. We can find any item properly packed and showcased in a hi-fi shop or the same item found with the street vendors(maybe of a different quality though). A city of extremes, made for those who wish to survive lavishly and also for those who are on an austerity drive but uncompromising on the items to be purchased.
     Mumbai can also be coined as "A city of chances, probabilities". One can never predict when and how can he\she succeed. People start with small businesses and start-ups and sometimes become millionaires while some of them go for a toss. It can also be coined as a dense forest of "buildings" where the number of people residing in a building can be equated with the number leaves in a tree. I have been residing here since my birth(21 years) and it was absolutely a wonderful experience. I have traveled in the buses, the trains and more than half of my life in Mumbai goes in travelling. Travelling gets even more challenging during the rainy season when majority of the trains are late, trains are overcrowded with apprehensive people willing to rush home early.It's just like an adventure where occurrence of events is dynamic.
      Criticism is something which is not very uncommon here. Waiting for a bus in a queue for a long time and seeing how unjustifiably buses are diverted to certain locations, walking on the road densely surrounded by people, common altercations amongst co-passengers are some of the situations which lead to a lot of irritation regularly.The absence of some solitary space while doing our daily chores is unfavourable sometimes.Another thing very common among Mumbaikars is their apathy towards socialisation. I find scarce socialisation here and people hardly come out of their houses and take efforts to speak to others. People are reluctant to get out of the 4 walls of their house. This can partly be blamed to the excessive obsession with electronic gadgets or the increased lethargy among citizens. Interactions with neighbours is at a all time low. We also think twice before acknowledging an acquaintance with a smile as if a smile costs a million dollars worth energy. Instead a smile spreads positive vibes worth more than a million dollars.
 Mumbai has a lot of good things to boast of starting from the delicious Mumbai chhat(found nowhere else in the world), the vada pav, pav bhaji and needless to mention and describe the plethora of landmarks and places(fashion street, the various temples and other religious shrines,the gateway of India....and the list is very long) which are uniquely special in their own way. The spirit of Mumbaikars is something worth admiration. Irrespective of so many blows and losses, people have never failed to rise again to show the world that they are unstoppable. The absence of socialisation is compensated by huge gatherings during festivals. Celebrations galore here with every festival celebrated with equal fervour.I really salute the people who go out of their way, remove time out of their busy schedules making arrangements for the festivals.

People residing here may have many issues to raise a hue and cry about but have never ceased loving this place. Once accustomed to the fast-paced life of Mumbai it becomes difficult to adapt to a slower and much relaxed life but one can live under the worst conditions as well. Mumbai-life has made me rough and tough.I, a resident of Mumbai, the city of dreams, vehemently state....."Mumbai meri jaaan hai(Mumbai is my life)"

The 'legendary' trip

     It's 4:30 a.m, December 27,2012 and I just attended the call of my alarm clock which is relentlessly investing its battery to wake me up. I get ready to reach the commencing point of the express train. The station near my locality is crowded, bustling with energy in the morning and I am standing with my wheeled luggage bag. Though now, more than the excitement of the journey, the anxiety of boarding the local train with the luggage is what bothers me the most. Albeit in the wee hours, the local trains can be very soothing and cosy, the "halo" effect imbibes some anxiety.
   Overcoming these barriers I reach the source platform for what can be called as the "Dream Journey". Going on a long trip with college mates was a totally different affair for me. All stood on the platform waving hands and greeting each other. After all the initial arrangements, the train whistle blew and it had started to take us to our destination. The excitement was such that for the initial hour or so, we only discussed and strengthened our "wonderlands" on how exciting and ecstasy-filled our journey was going to be.
  The first thing on plate was the antakshari(singing) in which we all pulled each other's leg on the songs we chose.Of course and as expected, romantic songs attracted the most "attention" as always. We never knew how time was also moving ahead with our songs and the sun had just positioned itself exactly on the top of our heads. It was a one day long journey and the following night we never slept. Making the most of the time, all of us gathered in the centre of our compartment in the train and were busy narrating some horror stories, trying to match them with reality and the horror with the darkness. Finally, when everyone just decided to retire for the day for atleast 2 hours, I had just sat with my companion, my novel.
  With the novel on my face and hands faintly resting on them, my eyes had just opened in the morning. A fresh sip of tea made my day and I was an hour away from destination whiling away my time looking at the naturally embellished mother nature.The destination was Bangalore, India's electronic city. After checking in the hotel,we all had the traditional and delicious "Idli-sambhar" for our breakfast.The first thing I did after having the breakfast is had "kapi"(coffee), as they call it in south India. I had no issues in communicating with the people there as I was familiar with the local language. The following night we left for Coorg.
  Coorg is a hill station with a pleasant climate and known for its coffee plantations. More than the places we visited, the overnight stay at the hotel was exciting. All football fans locked up in a room were totally geared for a nerve-gripping match. Meanwhile, I and one of my mates, ventured out to explore this beautiful place, bought some coffee and returned to our hotel. The cherry on the cake were the rains there, unusual winter rains; not to mention, we got drenched in the rains to have "kapi" again.  +fahim siddiquei  , hope you remember the night walk there.
Mysore was the next stop. Needless to say, known for the "Palace" by the great Tipu sultan. We hired a guide who could clearly explain the history and its origins to make more meaning of the visit. I really admire the dedication and skills of the builders back then with limited technology and resources, they have built a masterpiece. Finally, after lunch, we all geared up to return to Bangalore.Now here was one more excitement, the bus journey. There was not even a moment in the bus when we didn't dance.  We danced on all types of songs leaving all the worries we had aside.
   It was 31st December, 2012 and a DJ party was arranged where I danced with all exuberance in the company of all those pleasant people with whom I spent 3 years of my life. I saw some people behaving in absurd way totally engrossed in the heat of the moment. The DJ, having completed his share of time with us was almost about to leave. Here, one of my friend went to him and never let him move an inch from his seat. Inspite of having our stomach filled with food, the jumping and random steps never reduced. The hotel was a 4-star hotel and going back and resting was equally exciting. Therefore after reaching a physical saturation, all of us returned to our respective rooms to relax. Aadesh, Bhavesh, Akshay,Bhushan and Amit  hope you remember this memorable dance.
  After all the excitement, came the evening of january 1,2013. Having being kissed by the pleasant celebration of new year, we also got kissed by the time which had indicated to make a move and end this memorable trip. Owing to all the excitement it had given us, time never allowed us to totally come back to normalcy from such a state. The train journey was still remaining, the place where we could finally sum up everything and slowly kiss Goodbye to the memorable trip. I spoke to one native guy in there who had also come to study trip while others were playing antakshari. Later on, I too joined the celebrations. We hardly slept that night knowing that the next day we all will be back home, doing the same old chores. Having had such cherishable moments together, we wanted to make even more of the remaining time. With each moment passing, the adage "Time and tide wait for none" was something which struck me the most. It never allowed me to keep any grief forever so it will equally not allow me to remain in this state forever. This is life!!
   Thus, I never knew how those seven unforgettable and memorable days passed, with each day the enjoyment increased exponentially. At this age, where responsibility and freedom go hand in hand, spending time with friends and getting to know them better was the best thing ever happened.

         The mesmerizing temperatures, the company of friends,multiplicity of places, the 31st night D.J. party and the unforgettable cosy stay at the hotel  and last but not the least the train journey; it is nothing but the unforgettable trip to the south in nutshell. The most cherishable days spent with friends.The trip was truly legen 'wait-for-it' dary trip.



    Any organisation paying a considerable amount of money as one's salary has one thing written on its door: "you don't have the necessary APTITUDE". Any diligent and deserving person, failing to clear the test would get depressed above reasonable limits.  They talk about not having the necessary APTITUDE.
   Let us now see how such aptitude is acquired. Well, all you need to do is sit with some book which provides certain fixed methods to solve the problem. Students who follow that method are said to have acquired the knowledge of how to solve the problem without actually putting to task one of the beautiful creations of the Almighty:THE BRAIN. They surely pass this test and get satisfied momentarily that things are in their favor and then to their dismay finally(except the deserving ones). This is what happens to some who qualify for the APTITUDE test but fail to make it. Let us now have a look at those who do not qualify.
   Here is a person, who slogs hard, works hard and does practical stuff but does not do one thing namely being a bookworm. He feels that the aptitude test doesn't test your aptitude but it tests how well you know the methods to solve a particular problem, how well you know the formula's irrespective of the methods used to derive it and the basic knowledge of it. Some might say, they only give the statistics and what and when to do is what students giving the aptitude tests decide. My reply would be  "Given a plate with rice, daal, pickle randomly arranged with various combinations and having been asked to reach the goal state which is a particular combination seen multiple number of times and present either strongly or bleakly in the memory, what is the great difficulty??" It's as good as taming the mind to recognize combinations and respond accordingly.
   ATTITUDE and THINKING and not only APTITUDE is what one must look out for.  According to me, people with ideas creativity must be preferred than those who sit in front of a book and try to memorize formula's to clear an apparently aptitude testing test. Though, I admit that there are some really good quality questions but now is the age of ideas and innovation. I would rather prefer a person, who is a little less on the above mentioned area but more on the train of thoughts.  The way a person thinks, the way he\she approached any problem in life, may it even be personal portrays the intelligence of the person more than any aptitude test could ever show. The programming skills which are required could be easily acquired now or later but the thinking which a person has should be the greatest asset to any organisation. Nowadays, workshops and seminar's are organised for people on how to interact and improve one's interpersonal skills which was once upon a time not a grave matter of concern.

     All I would say in this issue is that a person must be judged face-to-face for his\her thinking, will power to learn things and his\her dedication. As told, the above mentioned skills can be acquired by any person but thinking is a gem among other things. One might as well say, a person can easily bluff showing fake optimism but I would say one cannot bluff about his unique thoughts and that becomes quite visible either ways.I nevertheless state that I am not against the practice of conducting aptitude tests but would be more pleased and at peace if questions which judge one's thinking, imagination would also have been included as a parameter for measuring a candidate.
Good day to all of you!