Monday, September 30, 2013

Criticism:the best tool for self-sympathy

                   "If the car isn't being driven properly, blame the car and not the driver."
    A very strange but true behavior I recently observed in humans is that criticism has become a tool for self condolence,self-sympathy. When people are unable to reach a stature in life, the best thing they do is criticize the stature(they were aiming for primarily by some or the other reason) and justify their own position(of failing) rather than identifying their shortcomings. By quoting the above phrase, I wish to convey exactly the same thing. What it actually means is that whenever the driver(the person) isn't able to drive correctly, he/she puts the onus on the situations/circumstances(the car) rather than on himself(the driver). It is but obvious that the car is only driven by the driver, maintained by the owner and hence it is the owner or the driver at fault and hardly the car(with a few exceptions).
    People often come with a imaginary high self-esteem for nothing which instills a fear in them to protect their apparent image. This attitude of people prevents them from learning new things and having an open-mind. The whole world is confined to protecting their own image by being obdurate to constructive criticism but freely criticising the people for the shoddy job(which actually may be worthy enough) they just accomplished. I recently experienced this in the campus recruitment drive which was organised by a noteworthy company in our college. With great amount of hardwork put in, I was selected by a giant IT firm entailing considerable respect in the market and having good prospects. I was without any doubt struck by the jubiliance that my hardwork paid off in a handsome way. The jubiliance was not only for getting a job but also for the kind of practical stuff which I was going to work on, having studied loads of theory all my life till date.
   The important aspect worth noting here is the attitude of some people who did not make it, the attitude of their "consoling" friends and some who just wanted to be a part of the "spectate and comment" type of attitude. These people are the ones who wish to spot the negativity in everything others do. People who could not make it were throwing barbs at the company and the people selected by the company. They were of the opinion that the company is "not that great". This indirectly implied that the people selected in the company were a sham or it happened just by luck. People who were not selected were consoled by so many who undermined the company and showed them some optimism by quoting "some better company might pick them up". All these statements come with a secondary meaning that the person selected got a company of "his worth" and that just because someone is not selected he is "more worthy". Very encouraging to the person who couldn't make it but equally discouraging for the person who got selected. Having said this, there are other subtle ways to encourage a person who wasn't selected. Maybe he might get any company which is equally worthy or a company where he deserves to be. There is no company more or less competent in the market; all that matters is one's own interest. Just because he/she doesnt like the job profile or did not make it to the company, its unfair call the company as bad/unworthy.
  I am totally against the practice of blaming other people/entity/organisation for one's own failure. Apart from the genuine people who were really left out, I found that many of them joined the wind of blaming the company and justifying themselves of being a "paragon" of knowledge. for some good people who were left out, opportunities are galore and the world is a huge place to leave out genuine talent unemployed. I staunchly believe that they will get their share but in a company in which they can adapt themselves culture-wise as well.

It's high time we retrospected on the aspects where we lacked rather than vehement criticism of the external conditions which are seldom under our control and which serves no purpose except that of "self symphatising" and apparent justification for one's failure. Finally I would like to end this blog on an inspiring quote:

"A man can fail many times, but he isn't a failure until he blames some one else"
- John Burroughs